For those of you who are super close to me and such you know I have had a goal in mind for YEARS. No joke, at least 17 years. That would put me at 5 years old right? Me and numbers ha. Anyway, since I could remember I have wanted to be an author and a teacher. The teacher part I am working on right now and that can only go so fast, but I have wanted more then anything to be an author. I have never cared if I would make a million dollars, or get a movie deal or anything huge like that. All I have ever wanted is for a book to be published with my name on it and allow one human being to escape into my world. Just forget what's going on around them. I wouldn't care if it got a thousand negative feedbacks, (ok maybe that would sting) but if one person said Wow, it would make everything ok in the world.
Since I was 5 I have "started" my books. I would write and write and write and then I BAM nothing. I think back to each book and I have no excuse to why I stopped, I just did. The funny thing is it's not only 10 pages in, it's like 50-90. I am near the finish line and I just abandon ship. I will write a few pages and let someone close to me read it. If they liked it I would keep going, if they didn't I would edit, rewrite and try again. I somehow just lose the motivation.
I have been told many times by my mother "If your scared to do something then it's probably right." I think I freak myself out when I near the end. "What if people actually do like this book?" I have never done anything amazing and never really utilized my talents to their fullest. I feel like pinterest. Yes you heard me pinterest. I keep pinning all of these ideas, and it appears I have all these talents, but that's where they stay stuck on my board with a tack. But after tonight I have decided. I have no more excuses. I have cashed in my last chip. I need to do this for myself. I need to become an example for my coming daughter that obtaining your goals and dreams is something everyone needs to strive for and it is possible! I have almost felt like I have just skated by in life with my goals. And I WILL finish at least one of my books. So if this post totally bores you, then I'm sorry but this is for me to look back on and see in writing that I have no excuses and I need to kick my butt into gear. So here it goes. I will complete a book of mine! Once that's accomplished I will move onto the publishing stage but we will take it a day at a time. Any ways, that's it, just had it get it off my chest. So watch out world. here I come!
